Sliver of Hope or Disappointment?

I have enjoyed this time away from work.  I have had the opportunity to spend more time with my husband, spend extra time in my garden, and get caught up on “back-burner” items.  I feel relaxed and rejuvenated.  As a Christ-follower, I value the time I’ve gotten to spend reading my Bible, praying, and reflecting.  I’m in awe looking over the past 3 ½ months and seeing the work being done to refine who I am.  God has been gently caring for us and reminding us how to find peace in his leadership in our lives.

My husband’s job situation this summer has evolved differently than we anticipated, so we are spending a lot of time together at home.  It has been awhile since the job search started, and originally, it was easy to enjoy all of the free time.  I have had the opportunity to catch up on life, so we are now entering a time where it is getting to be more challenging to be thankful for the free time.  My mind is being challenged less on a daily basis, so I don't feel like it's as sharp as it was.  We decided to give up TV because it is so easy to slip into a TV coma when you’ve got an abundance of time.  This has been helpful as it has made us look to books, hobbies, MN summer activities, and time with others. 

I feel excited about my potential job prospects.  Job #1 (from the previous post), I am at the background and reference check phase of the interview process.  Another job, I had a first interview on Friday.  Both of these prospects are GREAT options.  They have good benefits, reasonable pay, and great office environments (near as I can tell).  When I am feeling hopeful, two worries constantly creep into my mind:

1)      Maybe I won’t get an offer from either of these places and I’ll be back at square one.  That means more free time and more risk of slipping into laziness.

2)      What if I get offered both jobs and I have to figure out how to decide.  I won’t know which job is the right one.  What if timing doesn’t work out and I somehow don’t end up with a job from either because I won’t know how to figure out the timing of job offers and answers.

I have mentioned how determined I am to break the mold on worry, so these thoughts are naturally frustrating!

I have the hope of a job AND I have daily battles with worry and laziness.  Some days I feel down, other days I feel hopeful.  In the meantime, our reliance on God’s provision is strengthened daily for our spiritual and physical needs.  God never said it would be easy, He did say that we wouldn’t be alone.  I am thankful for God’s presence on the hopeful days and on the hard days.